Everything is Beautiful (in its own way)

Had a little misunderstanding on Jim Butcher's mailing list earlier. There was a thread which had gone from word meanings to dress. One poster had written about seeing a five year old girl dressed in a skin tight mini skirt, hot pink tight top and knee length boots with two inch heels. Oh, and fish net stockings(what else).

There were a few posts in which the words decent/indecent came up regarding the issue of dressing a five year old (or allowing her to dress) this way. I wrote in mentioning that, emotionally charged words aside, it was a very constrictive, uncomfortable, and unhealthy (two inch heels are a bitch on adult feet, what they'll cost to a five year old years down the line is a matter for chiropodists to speculate).

As an aside, I happened to mention that I thought it was totally inappropriate unless you were between the ages of 18 and 29 and had a perfect, bulgeless body. I should know better than to speak lightly.

So, naturally, someone posted to the list that they weren't criticizing my opinion, then went on to suggest that I'm also revolted by the idea of elderly people having sex, that our society (and I by association) am superficial and only think perfect bodies should be seen. I have a sneaking suspicion she thinks I am between 18 and 29, with a fab bod who spends my time snickering at ugly people.

I'm feeling a little irritated right now that I'm feeling defensive about my opinion. After all, one of my favorite Twilight Zone episodes is "Number 22 Looks Just Like You" about a future where people were forced to have surgery so that everyone would be beautiful (and lobotomized). Rod Serling was a good writer who managed to say a lot in a half hour playlet about the nature of beauty and the importance of individuality and diversity. It was ahead of its time, in this age of plastic surgery and extreme makeovers. It worries me sometimes. It's shown so much on TV and the movies; we're getting Hollywood's view on the importance of looks shoved down our throats. I've written before that I'm an optimist, so I still believe that the majority of people outside Hollywood and NYC don't buy into that.

I'm 44 and not ashamed to say it (or put it on this blog). I'm also short and stout (being kind here) and if I ever go outside in a midriff baring outfit, it would be because my cold, stiff body is being taken out by ambulance.

Am I ashamed of my body? No. Neither do I think it's a work of art. Because I say that, some people might try to tell me I have "poor self esteem." My reply would be that it's a fair and honest assessment and I'm comfortable with it. Isn't it more a sign of poor self esteem if you're afraid to be honest with yourself?

Maybe it's my age, maybe it's just the way I was raised, but I don't believe that flaunting my body, wearing revealing outfits, shows pride in myself. It has nothing to do with sexuality. I was taught to dress to complement my body, minimize the flaws, accentuate the positive. Even if I were gorgeous, the same rules would apply. I've seen pictures of beautiful movie stars wearing outfits that didn't flatter them. Did they know that when they looked in the mirror and didn't care? If they did, I say go for it, girl! Just don't anybody insist that I say that they're looking their best.

Why CompuServe 7.0 sucks

When I hooked up my new computer, I was glad I'd saved the CD my ISP had sent me several months ago, when I'd had to reload it. It had been fouled up then, too, I forget the details. My old computer couldn't support the latest version, so I continued with Compuserve 4.0, which suited me anyway, as I was used to it.

Now here I was with Compuserve 7.0, and the problems started almost immediately. Suddenly, I couldn't log in to My Space. Every attempt took me back to the sign up page, and when I tried to sign up again I'd get an error message. I contacted My Space three times and received no reply. Guess you get what you pay for.

Then I noticed when I went to My Preferences and tried to change anything, CS would freeze, forcing me to log off. And my computer would freeze if I tried to log back on too soon.

Now to Blogger. My dashboard looked strange. I saw the problem: the blogger news that they post under the dashboard was now superimposed over my dashboard. And none of my dashboard controls would work. Wrote to Blogger. Three times. See the last sentence two paragraphs back.

By this time I was increasingly irritated and worried and decided to bring some of the problems to the attention of Compuserve. I wrote to them about My Space and Blogger (hadn't realized the "Preferences" problem yet) and received a disinterested reply that I should really get in touch with the web sites in question, as how could this be Compuserve's fault.

I had installed Firefox, on the recommendations of a few friends, when I set up the new computer. Jerry had sent me a DVD-rom with some of his favorite freeware programs he'd found over the years.

A few nights ago, at a loss for any solutions, I had activated Firefox. For the hell of it, I decided to try connecting to Blogger through it. Since you're reading this, you can guess the outcome. And My Space. Success there also. JKRowling.com, which I had just discovered I couldn't access, except through the text only version on good old CS? You probably can guess that too.

I'm only paying $14.95 a month for CS, though I'm thinking of adjusting my budget enough to spring for DSL. But we have Comcast cable at work, and it has it's down moments. I could add, once more, that you get what you pay for. But Firefox is free.