| Miss Snark, the literary agent's blog, is hosting the results of one of her infrequent crap-o'meters. This one invited aspiring authors to send in a 250 word (or less) hook for their unpublished novel. The idea is to give her the query that you would send to an agent -- a brief statement of what your book is about. As she writes in one of her critiques, you have about 8 seconds to get the agent's interest, then your letter gets thrown on the crap pile. Very informative for any prospective author. Fun reading for those of you who aren't. After you read enough of these -- and the responses they engender -- you may just find yourself writing for clarity, even in your notes to the paper boy or baby sitter. Oh, and my reading material? I'm starting it tomorrow. With very low expectations. The scariest monsters keep lurking in dark places. Not trotted out as children with all their psychoses plopped on the page. |
Monday, December 18, 2006
Happy Hooker Crap-o'meter
Saturday, December 16, 2006
NaNo haters
Not much new. I seem to have little time for keeping up with my blog. That should change after Christmas. Right now I'm working on my NaNo novel: The Andrews Bride -- trying to get it finished by Jan. 1st. I want to have time to edit it a little. Lulu, a print on demand service, offers a free copy of every NaNo winner's book, but you have to submit it by Jan. 16th. It's always a thrill to see your book actually looking like a book. And Lulu makes a profit since most people probably buy one or two for family and friends.
Of course, some authors can be pretty snobbish about it. I've seen blogs where NaNo is called a waste of time. That it deludes people into believing they're authors. That it encourages people to write crap.
I realize that writing doesn't make you an "author." Or good. But I do think that writing x amounts of words a day to get to a monthly word count encourages discipline. And while it's not possible to learn rules of spelling or grammar just by writing, the sheer amount of writing may lead to better fluency and flow. Maybe even an interest in improving one's grammar.
One of the objections seems to be that most of the NaNo participants will never become published. I can't understand why anyone would care about that. I've been on the forums enough to know that a lot of them have no interest in writing for a living. They're doing it as a one time or yearly thing, just for fun. Or they do write year round, but it's a hobby.
When is the last time you read a blog from a pro golfer bitching about all the people who play golf who have no chance of ever going pro? Or a chef making fun of people who take a culinary course at their local community college? Don't authors understand that writing can be a hobby?
And if someone does have a story that they dream of having published one day? And if they want to begin in November using NaNo to push themselves? Telling yourself that you're going to be writing crap isn't giving yourself permission to be bad. It's just a way of getting started and not being too disappointed when that first draft turns out not to be a finished, polished manuscript.
I think most of us picture our favorite authors sitting down and turning out a perfect book in one draft. Deciding "if what I write doesn't come out perfectly in the first draft I might as well quit" may be one of the biggest delusions that causes people to quit prematurely. If NaNo does nothing else, it frees you from worrying about perfection. Get the words down first. If you have the talent and the discipline and are willing to work hard, you may just turn it into a decent manuscript some day.
If I thought that authors were, as a rule, jealous or fearful of competition, I could understand NaNo put downs. But from what I've seen through blogs and web sites and my limited contact with writers, the majority are very supportive and encouraging with each other and with aspiring authors.
Authors recognize that their profession doesn't have the same sort of cut throat competition of many other careers. Each author is competing more against himself than anyone else. They're competing for readers, but one author's success doesn't signal failure for the others. It's not as if The DaVinci Code killed off that type of book. On the contrary, its success has lead to a run on religious conspiracy action adventure thrillers. Similarly, the success of the Left Behind series showed publishers that there was a market for Christian fiction and opened up greater opportunities for writers who wished to work in that genre.
If I have to guess, I'd say their objections may be because NaNo doesn't fall within their parameters of the Right Way to become an author. An aspiring author should determine if he has the talent for it, and if so, keep writing and rewriting until he learns his craft. Most writers also advise enrolling in a reputable class and joining a writing group for critique and feedback.
Since participating in NaNo doesn't preclude doing any of that, I still don't see the problem some writers have with it.
Sunday, November 19, 2006
Cheated
Tonight, for the first time, I cheated on NaNo. I didn't last year. Last year I wrote no matter what. Even when my cat was hospitalized and they told me he was very weak from loss of blood and would probably die. I wrote my quota the three nights he was in, and I wrote my quota when I'd brought him home and had to give him pills several times a day and try to get him to eat.
I even made my quota the day I picked him up and got a look at the bill.
But I received some bad news tonight, at about my 1400th word, and I was too upset for awhile to think about my story. If I hadn't put off writing until evening, and writing at a slow pace in between doing other things, I would already have made my total when I found out.
Part of the trouble was that I didn't find anything out. I found out there was something bad, but that I couldn't be told what it was because it had been told in confidence to the person who told me. Who didn't tell me. He just told me that there was something to tell and it wasn't good.
Jesus. You cannot tell me something like that and expect me to take it well.
So I cried a little, imagining horrible things. Then I saw the clock ticking away and looked at the half-filled page and had no desire to write anything about my story.
So I hit "enter" a few times and started venting about what had just happened. It was in my story's document, and it is writing. It's certainly colorful and expressive. Technically, maybe it isn't cheating and if it is, I'm only cheating myself.
But I don't want to cheat myself. I'm going back to the story, even if it is late, and try to write a little more that will count towards yesterday's total.
I even made my quota the day I picked him up and got a look at the bill.
But I received some bad news tonight, at about my 1400th word, and I was too upset for awhile to think about my story. If I hadn't put off writing until evening, and writing at a slow pace in between doing other things, I would already have made my total when I found out.
Part of the trouble was that I didn't find anything out. I found out there was something bad, but that I couldn't be told what it was because it had been told in confidence to the person who told me. Who didn't tell me. He just told me that there was something to tell and it wasn't good.
Jesus. You cannot tell me something like that and expect me to take it well.
So I cried a little, imagining horrible things. Then I saw the clock ticking away and looked at the half-filled page and had no desire to write anything about my story.
So I hit "enter" a few times and started venting about what had just happened. It was in my story's document, and it is writing. It's certainly colorful and expressive. Technically, maybe it isn't cheating and if it is, I'm only cheating myself.
But I don't want to cheat myself. I'm going back to the story, even if it is late, and try to write a little more that will count towards yesterday's total.
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
Halfway Mark
Halfway point and all is well. Almost 25,000 words (I’m 100 short). Close enough to halfway to say I’m halfway. Of course, I’m padding a bit, but my pre-NaNo efforts to work out the plot and structure seem to be paying off. I’m trying to show instead of tell and set up situations that move from simple to complex and reach a crisis and resolution. Since it’s a romance, not a thriller, I don’t know if there’s going to be a huge crisis at the end, or rather that the crisis will seem big enough. There’s tragedy, but I don’t know if that’s a crisis.
My mood goes up and down. Sometimes it’s a struggle and I don’t make my daily quota. I had a good night tonight. I went into it a few hundred shy of 22,000 and didn’t figure I’d make it halfway. But I thought up this good scene, kind of humorous, not rolling in the aisles funny. But it does help reveal the characters and shows them moving closer together, in spite of the difficulties I’ve given the poor guy.
I’ve been dealing with a funny sort of guilt and sorrow. I knew going into the story that a major character was going to die near the end of the book, and I feel like a murderer, especially as I’m getting to know him better and better. I feel like an executioner, to be more precise.
To get back to the scene I wrote tonight, it illustrates the best part of NaNo. When you can really get into the flow it’s like running downhill with a stiff wind at your back and daily word quotas are a breeze. I didn’t even have an inkling earlier that it was going to spring inside my head, fully formed, like I was watching a movie.
Some days you have to force it. The best way to describe it is that it’s like running away from a mob. You have to keep moving, . You can’t stop to tie your shoe and if you drop something it’s gone. But when you’re running like that, you find reserves of creativity you didn’t know you possessed. It’s like automatic writing, and probably parts are coming from your own life experiences, mixed with the plot you’d already devised for that chapter or scene.
My mood goes up and down. Sometimes it’s a struggle and I don’t make my daily quota. I had a good night tonight. I went into it a few hundred shy of 22,000 and didn’t figure I’d make it halfway. But I thought up this good scene, kind of humorous, not rolling in the aisles funny. But it does help reveal the characters and shows them moving closer together, in spite of the difficulties I’ve given the poor guy.
I’ve been dealing with a funny sort of guilt and sorrow. I knew going into the story that a major character was going to die near the end of the book, and I feel like a murderer, especially as I’m getting to know him better and better. I feel like an executioner, to be more precise.
To get back to the scene I wrote tonight, it illustrates the best part of NaNo. When you can really get into the flow it’s like running downhill with a stiff wind at your back and daily word quotas are a breeze. I didn’t even have an inkling earlier that it was going to spring inside my head, fully formed, like I was watching a movie.
Some days you have to force it. The best way to describe it is that it’s like running away from a mob. You have to keep moving, . You can’t stop to tie your shoe and if you drop something it’s gone. But when you’re running like that, you find reserves of creativity you didn’t know you possessed. It’s like automatic writing, and probably parts are coming from your own life experiences, mixed with the plot you’d already devised for that chapter or scene.
Tuesday, October 31, 2006
Nearly Nano
That's National Novel Writing Month (November 1st to 30th) to the uninitiated. Starting at midnight, I’m writing 1700 words a day for thirty days and will finish the month with slightly over 50,000 words.
Last year I made my goal. The least I wrote per day was about 1300 words, the most was 3500 (to make that final push and go over the target a few days early). As long as you average out to 1667 at least. You can’t have too many 1300 word days and expect to win.
Last year I won. I know it’s doable. If you go into this with the right mindset, you need to write quickly and freely, not worrying about how well you’re writing or if everything is grammatically perfect. You can’t go back and agonize that your plotting or characterizations aren’t perfect. You can’t edit. Not until December first. You don’t have to finish your novel.
The best achievement with NaNo is showing you proof that you can write a good amount of words in one month. Maybe you couldn’t keep it up every month, but if you want to be a writer – to write at least one novel – you wouldn’t need to. Even if you took three or four months to write 100,000 words and another month or two to edit and a few more months for it to make the rounds of your more literate friends for grammar polishing and plot first aid, that’s still a finished book a less than a year. One that’s in pretty good shape, hopefully, by the end of the process. Maybe even a book that’s close to publishable.
This year I’m nervous. I’m afraid of freezing. Afraid of the dreaded sophomore slump. Afraid that I’ll care too much about how this work turns out and not be able to tell myself each day, as I sit down to write, “well I’m going to work on my crappy novel now.”
It worked last year. If I set out deciding that what I wrote would be garbage, it helped keep me going.
Last year I my aim was to prove to myself that I could write the amount. My 50,000 words needed quite a bit of editing and rewriting to fix plot holes, but for the most part it flowed much better than I thought I would.
This year I’m trying to exceed last year’s goal. I’ve worked harder beforehand on plotting and structure. I’ve tried to think of plot points that would drive the story onward instead of just meandering about (a flaw in last year’s work). I’m not expecting the writing to be any better or worse than last year, but I do hope, at the end of this, the story will hang together more tightly.
Hmmm… that’s 509 words (for the whole blog; I didn’t do a word count until I finished this). About three times more than that, and I’ll have a day’s word count. It’s not a matter of luck; it’s determination. Here’s hoping I have some of both though.
Last year I made my goal. The least I wrote per day was about 1300 words, the most was 3500 (to make that final push and go over the target a few days early). As long as you average out to 1667 at least. You can’t have too many 1300 word days and expect to win.
Last year I won. I know it’s doable. If you go into this with the right mindset, you need to write quickly and freely, not worrying about how well you’re writing or if everything is grammatically perfect. You can’t go back and agonize that your plotting or characterizations aren’t perfect. You can’t edit. Not until December first. You don’t have to finish your novel.
The best achievement with NaNo is showing you proof that you can write a good amount of words in one month. Maybe you couldn’t keep it up every month, but if you want to be a writer – to write at least one novel – you wouldn’t need to. Even if you took three or four months to write 100,000 words and another month or two to edit and a few more months for it to make the rounds of your more literate friends for grammar polishing and plot first aid, that’s still a finished book a less than a year. One that’s in pretty good shape, hopefully, by the end of the process. Maybe even a book that’s close to publishable.
This year I’m nervous. I’m afraid of freezing. Afraid of the dreaded sophomore slump. Afraid that I’ll care too much about how this work turns out and not be able to tell myself each day, as I sit down to write, “well I’m going to work on my crappy novel now.”
It worked last year. If I set out deciding that what I wrote would be garbage, it helped keep me going.
Last year I my aim was to prove to myself that I could write the amount. My 50,000 words needed quite a bit of editing and rewriting to fix plot holes, but for the most part it flowed much better than I thought I would.
This year I’m trying to exceed last year’s goal. I’ve worked harder beforehand on plotting and structure. I’ve tried to think of plot points that would drive the story onward instead of just meandering about (a flaw in last year’s work). I’m not expecting the writing to be any better or worse than last year, but I do hope, at the end of this, the story will hang together more tightly.
Hmmm… that’s 509 words (for the whole blog; I didn’t do a word count until I finished this). About three times more than that, and I’ll have a day’s word count. It’s not a matter of luck; it’s determination. Here’s hoping I have some of both though.
Sunday, October 22, 2006
An open letter to the people (and government) of Kazakhstan
Dear folks:
Don't worry about that Borat movie. Most of the civilized world understands vicious satire. And, like Oscar Wilde once stated: "It is better to be talked about than not to be talked about." Someone else said, "There's no such thing as bad publicity," though, since I can't remember who, he obviously didn't get enough of it. If any of you are familiar with the name Paris Hilton, you know the truth of the above statements.
Nobody in the United States believes anything seen on screen, including the news. We take everything with a grain of salt. We are the nation of stand-up comedians, spin doctors, and lawyers. We have no standards. None of the Americans the Borat guy fooled in the filming of the movie seem to care unless they go to see it and find their screen time got cut. Then you'll hear screaming.
Look at McDonalds. Are they upset about Fast Food Nation? Not a corporate lawyer in sight. Since the fast food joint in the movie is called 'Mickeys' you can't get much more obvious. But McDonalds understands that they are untouchable. As long as they make tasty fried mass produced food-like products at a reasonable price, the world will be pouring money into their coffers.
If one enterprising Kazakhstani follows the same path, there could be a Koumis and horse sausage kiosk on every street corner on Earth by 2025. Though take my advice and study McDonalds' methods: up the sugar content of the former and deep fry the latter. McNuggets were an acquired taste in China and Qatar.
Don't worry about any of us here thinking worse of Kazakhstan. Until this brouhaha over the Borat movie, 98% of us didn't know there was a Kazakhstan. That two percent did is thanks for the most part to an American movie: Air Force One. And that was largely because Gary Oldman played the lead terrorist. Who wasn't a wimp or a clown. He was kickin.
Since the controversy broke, the number of people here who know about Kazakhstan is at least five percent and rising. Which is spectacular since the guy who plays Borat is no Gary Oldman.
Don't take the ignorance of Americans as a slur against Kazakhstan. We're famous for our lack of geographic knowledge and our disinterest in any cultures other than our own. According to a CNN article last May, two-thirds of Americans aged 18 to 24 can't find Iraq or Iran on a map. Heck, 33% of them can't even find Louisiana. The shameful part is that of the 33%, 5% live in Louisiana. Okay, I made the last one up. I hope.
Movie stars are even worse, not just the American ones (the Borat guy is English, by the way). Eighty-seven percent of them can't find their butts with a map and a guide.*
So, in conclusion, the Borat movie can only be beneficial for Kazakhstan. None of the bad stuff will be remembered (or believed) for an instant. If you're still worried, hire an official spokesperson. Preferably a movie star. Gary Oldman might be free. Pose him next to an oil well with a big glass of Koumis. Did I mention we also love countries with big oil wells who don't hate us? That Borat guy is English, by the way. Colonial oppression, looking down on the natives, what, what. Not one of us.
*Just a little joke on my part, which movie stars would be the first to laugh at. All movie stars know where their a$$ is. They spend most of their time with their heads up there, removing them only when a photo op presents itself. When a photographer or movie camera appears at a Hollywood party, it sounds like dozens of champagne bottles uncorking at once. Very festive.
Don't worry about that Borat movie. Most of the civilized world understands vicious satire. And, like Oscar Wilde once stated: "It is better to be talked about than not to be talked about." Someone else said, "There's no such thing as bad publicity," though, since I can't remember who, he obviously didn't get enough of it. If any of you are familiar with the name Paris Hilton, you know the truth of the above statements.
Nobody in the United States believes anything seen on screen, including the news. We take everything with a grain of salt. We are the nation of stand-up comedians, spin doctors, and lawyers. We have no standards. None of the Americans the Borat guy fooled in the filming of the movie seem to care unless they go to see it and find their screen time got cut. Then you'll hear screaming.
Look at McDonalds. Are they upset about Fast Food Nation? Not a corporate lawyer in sight. Since the fast food joint in the movie is called 'Mickeys' you can't get much more obvious. But McDonalds understands that they are untouchable. As long as they make tasty fried mass produced food-like products at a reasonable price, the world will be pouring money into their coffers.
If one enterprising Kazakhstani follows the same path, there could be a Koumis and horse sausage kiosk on every street corner on Earth by 2025. Though take my advice and study McDonalds' methods: up the sugar content of the former and deep fry the latter. McNuggets were an acquired taste in China and Qatar.
Don't worry about any of us here thinking worse of Kazakhstan. Until this brouhaha over the Borat movie, 98% of us didn't know there was a Kazakhstan. That two percent did is thanks for the most part to an American movie: Air Force One. And that was largely because Gary Oldman played the lead terrorist. Who wasn't a wimp or a clown. He was kickin.
Since the controversy broke, the number of people here who know about Kazakhstan is at least five percent and rising. Which is spectacular since the guy who plays Borat is no Gary Oldman.
Don't take the ignorance of Americans as a slur against Kazakhstan. We're famous for our lack of geographic knowledge and our disinterest in any cultures other than our own. According to a CNN article last May, two-thirds of Americans aged 18 to 24 can't find Iraq or Iran on a map. Heck, 33% of them can't even find Louisiana. The shameful part is that of the 33%, 5% live in Louisiana. Okay, I made the last one up. I hope.
Movie stars are even worse, not just the American ones (the Borat guy is English, by the way). Eighty-seven percent of them can't find their butts with a map and a guide.*
So, in conclusion, the Borat movie can only be beneficial for Kazakhstan. None of the bad stuff will be remembered (or believed) for an instant. If you're still worried, hire an official spokesperson. Preferably a movie star. Gary Oldman might be free. Pose him next to an oil well with a big glass of Koumis. Did I mention we also love countries with big oil wells who don't hate us? That Borat guy is English, by the way. Colonial oppression, looking down on the natives, what, what. Not one of us.
*Just a little joke on my part, which movie stars would be the first to laugh at. All movie stars know where their a$$ is. They spend most of their time with their heads up there, removing them only when a photo op presents itself. When a photographer or movie camera appears at a Hollywood party, it sounds like dozens of champagne bottles uncorking at once. Very festive.
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
Comedy Tomorrow! Tragedy Tonight!
I was watching the news while working on my computer. Or rather, I was listening to the news; TV is mostly used for background noise. My full attention is on the computer monitor -- whatever I'm reading or typing there.
Because I don't pay attention, a lot of times the program I was mildly interested in (or at least didn't mind as background noise) ends and I don't notice until something annoying comes on. Tonight, it was Insider, which is listed in the program description as: "Celebrity interviews and Hollywood dish drive this entertainment-news magazine."
Their lead-off story tonight was the arraignment of John Mark Karr. JonBenet Ramsey's alleged killer. This is supposed to qualify as entertainment news? Why? Because JonBenet had been in child beauty pageants? Because her parents became reluctant media celebrities thanks to the sensational nature of the case? Or because we don't even pretend anymore that murder trials are anything but entertainment except for the people who are directly involved?
Am I the only one who finds it jarring? "Coming up on Insider, we go to John Mark Karr's arraignment! We interview Paris Hilton and Clay Aiken about their new albums! The first public interview with John Mark Carr's first wife -- did she think he was capable of murder? We talk with Sarah, who's 29 and has a problem -- she's still a virgin! Watch as we try to help her find that special someone! Listen to our exclusive preview of the phone tapes. Is it Karr's voice?"
And on and on. And plenty of plugs for ET, which is coming up next and has pictures of the "Colorado slammer" where he'll be interred. Oh, and Jennifer Annistan's directorial debut and plastic surgery gone wrong, wrong, wrong!
It's the global scale making it worse. It's done now with such calculation. "Entertainment" shows are packaging human misery with greater and greater zest and polish. Humanity acts pretty much the same as it always has. In the days before movies and radio, people used to go to public executions. Pileups or accidents have always brought gawkers -- from the age of the chariot to the automobile age. Or if you were part of a scandal, all your neighbors and townspeople would point and gossip and speculate.
But at least when it was small scale, you might know the people involved. You felt shock or horror or sympathy. You were close enough to smell the blood and see the anguish. I guess it's just another way that we're all becoming more desensitized.
I wonder how long it'll be until we regress to fights to the death and competitive maiming? It used to be a cliche in speculative shows (like Star Trek) and books. Now it seems less of a platitude and more of a prediction.
Because I don't pay attention, a lot of times the program I was mildly interested in (or at least didn't mind as background noise) ends and I don't notice until something annoying comes on. Tonight, it was Insider, which is listed in the program description as: "Celebrity interviews and Hollywood dish drive this entertainment-news magazine."
Their lead-off story tonight was the arraignment of John Mark Karr. JonBenet Ramsey's alleged killer. This is supposed to qualify as entertainment news? Why? Because JonBenet had been in child beauty pageants? Because her parents became reluctant media celebrities thanks to the sensational nature of the case? Or because we don't even pretend anymore that murder trials are anything but entertainment except for the people who are directly involved?
Am I the only one who finds it jarring? "Coming up on Insider, we go to John Mark Karr's arraignment! We interview Paris Hilton and Clay Aiken about their new albums! The first public interview with John Mark Carr's first wife -- did she think he was capable of murder? We talk with Sarah, who's 29 and has a problem -- she's still a virgin! Watch as we try to help her find that special someone! Listen to our exclusive preview of the phone tapes. Is it Karr's voice?"
And on and on. And plenty of plugs for ET, which is coming up next and has pictures of the "Colorado slammer" where he'll be interred. Oh, and Jennifer Annistan's directorial debut and plastic surgery gone wrong, wrong, wrong!
It's the global scale making it worse. It's done now with such calculation. "Entertainment" shows are packaging human misery with greater and greater zest and polish. Humanity acts pretty much the same as it always has. In the days before movies and radio, people used to go to public executions. Pileups or accidents have always brought gawkers -- from the age of the chariot to the automobile age. Or if you were part of a scandal, all your neighbors and townspeople would point and gossip and speculate.
But at least when it was small scale, you might know the people involved. You felt shock or horror or sympathy. You were close enough to smell the blood and see the anguish. I guess it's just another way that we're all becoming more desensitized.
I wonder how long it'll be until we regress to fights to the death and competitive maiming? It used to be a cliche in speculative shows (like Star Trek) and books. Now it seems less of a platitude and more of a prediction.
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
Roughing It
Taken from a web site:
LIFE IN THE 1500'S
The next time you are washing your hands and complain because the water temperature isn't just how you like it, think about how things used to be.
Here are some interesting...facts about the 1500s:
Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May, and still smelled pretty good by June. However, they were starting to smell, so brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odor. Hence the custom today of carrying a bouquet when getting married.
Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water. The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the other sons and men, then the women and finally the children. Last of all the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it. Hence the saying, Don't throw the baby out with the Bath water..
Houses had thatched roofs-thick straw-piled high, with no wood underneath. It was the only place for animals to get warm, so all the cats and other small animals (mice, bugs) lived in the roof. When it rained it became slippery and sometimes the animals would slip and fall off the roof. Hence the saying . It's raining cats and dogs.
There was nothing to stop things from falling into the house. This posed a real problem in the bedroom where bugs and other droppings could mess up your nice clean bed. Hence, a bed with big posts and a sheet hung over the top afforded some protection. That's how canopy beds came into existence.
The floor was dirt. Only the wealthy had something other than dirt. Hence the saying, Dirt poor.
The wealthy had slate floors That would get slippery in the winter when wet , so they spread thresh (straw) on floor to help keep their footing. As the winter wore on, they added more thresh until, when you opened the door, it would all start slipping outside. A piece of wood was placed in the entranceway. Hence the saying a ...thresh hold..
In those old days, they cooked in the kitchen with a big kettle that always hung over the fire. Every day they lit the fire and added things to the pot. They ate mostly vegetables and did not get much meat. They would eat the stew for dinner, leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold overnight and then start over the next day. Sometimes stew had food in it that had been there for quite a while. Hence the rhyme, Peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot nine days old..
Sometimes they could obtain pork, which made them feel quite special. When visitors came over, they would hang up their bacon to show off. It was a sign of wealth that a man could, bring home the bacon.. They would cut off a little to share with guests and would all sit around and chew the fat..
Those with money had plates made of pewter [a silver and lead alloy]. Food with high acid content caused some of the lead to leach onto the food, causing lead poisoning death. This happened most often with tomatoes, so for the next 400 years or so, tomatoes were considered poisonous.
Bread was divided according to status. Workers got the burnt bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle, and guests got the top, or the upper crust.
Lead cups were used to drink ale or whiskey. The combination would sometimes knock the imbibers out for a couple of days. Someone walking along the road would take them for dead and prepare them for burial. They were laid out on the kitchen table for a couple of days and the family would gather around and eat and drink and wait and see if they would wake up. Hence the custom of holding a wake.
England is old and small and the local folks started running out of places to bury people. So they would dig up coffins and would take the bones to a bone-house, and reuse the grave. When reopening these coffins, 1 out of 25 coffins were found to have scratch marks on the inside and they realized they had been burying people alive. So they would tie a string on the wrist of the corpse, lead it through the coffin and up through the ground and tie it to a bell. Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night (the "graveyard shift") to listen for the bell; thus, someone could be saved by bell, or was considered a dead ringer..
Now me:
And this is why I'm glad I live in the twenty-first century. And why I never understood roughing it in the wilderness.
Mankind spent who knows how many millennia crouching around a fire eating charred meat and retiring to caves or huts with no electricity, running water or toilet facilities. Then getting up the next morning to chase game all day and a missed kill meant no charred meat that night. Generation after generation lived in exactly the same way, with no more hope for changes or improvements than their great-great grandparents had.
But mankind did made progress, very slowly at first: one invention leading to small improvements in the quality of living; one idea leading to more and better ideas. Slowly, very slowly at first, inventions and ideas building upon each other. Then during the Renaissance picking up speed -- faster and faster, leading to better and better quality of life. The explosion of ideas in the last century and a half has resulted in such massive lifestyle changes and improvements in comfort and technology that someone who lived only four generations ago would be amazed at the difference in lifestyle.
I won't be camping out anytime soon! Not even the thirty foot trailers with the running water, TV and air conditioners. If you want that, why not stay at home? And if you want the real cave man experience, go flick your light on and off a few times or get a cold drink out of the refrigerator and think about all the people who've lived before you who would have thought themselves in paradise!
LIFE IN THE 1500'S
The next time you are washing your hands and complain because the water temperature isn't just how you like it, think about how things used to be.
Here are some interesting...facts about the 1500s:
Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May, and still smelled pretty good by June. However, they were starting to smell, so brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odor. Hence the custom today of carrying a bouquet when getting married.
Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water. The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the other sons and men, then the women and finally the children. Last of all the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it. Hence the saying, Don't throw the baby out with the Bath water..
Houses had thatched roofs-thick straw-piled high, with no wood underneath. It was the only place for animals to get warm, so all the cats and other small animals (mice, bugs) lived in the roof. When it rained it became slippery and sometimes the animals would slip and fall off the roof. Hence the saying . It's raining cats and dogs.
There was nothing to stop things from falling into the house. This posed a real problem in the bedroom where bugs and other droppings could mess up your nice clean bed. Hence, a bed with big posts and a sheet hung over the top afforded some protection. That's how canopy beds came into existence.
The floor was dirt. Only the wealthy had something other than dirt. Hence the saying, Dirt poor.
The wealthy had slate floors That would get slippery in the winter when wet , so they spread thresh (straw) on floor to help keep their footing. As the winter wore on, they added more thresh until, when you opened the door, it would all start slipping outside. A piece of wood was placed in the entranceway. Hence the saying a ...thresh hold..
In those old days, they cooked in the kitchen with a big kettle that always hung over the fire. Every day they lit the fire and added things to the pot. They ate mostly vegetables and did not get much meat. They would eat the stew for dinner, leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold overnight and then start over the next day. Sometimes stew had food in it that had been there for quite a while. Hence the rhyme, Peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot nine days old..
Sometimes they could obtain pork, which made them feel quite special. When visitors came over, they would hang up their bacon to show off. It was a sign of wealth that a man could, bring home the bacon.. They would cut off a little to share with guests and would all sit around and chew the fat..
Those with money had plates made of pewter [a silver and lead alloy]. Food with high acid content caused some of the lead to leach onto the food, causing lead poisoning death. This happened most often with tomatoes, so for the next 400 years or so, tomatoes were considered poisonous.
Bread was divided according to status. Workers got the burnt bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle, and guests got the top, or the upper crust.
Lead cups were used to drink ale or whiskey. The combination would sometimes knock the imbibers out for a couple of days. Someone walking along the road would take them for dead and prepare them for burial. They were laid out on the kitchen table for a couple of days and the family would gather around and eat and drink and wait and see if they would wake up. Hence the custom of holding a wake.
England is old and small and the local folks started running out of places to bury people. So they would dig up coffins and would take the bones to a bone-house, and reuse the grave. When reopening these coffins, 1 out of 25 coffins were found to have scratch marks on the inside and they realized they had been burying people alive. So they would tie a string on the wrist of the corpse, lead it through the coffin and up through the ground and tie it to a bell. Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night (the "graveyard shift") to listen for the bell; thus, someone could be saved by bell, or was considered a dead ringer..
Now me:
And this is why I'm glad I live in the twenty-first century. And why I never understood roughing it in the wilderness.
Mankind spent who knows how many millennia crouching around a fire eating charred meat and retiring to caves or huts with no electricity, running water or toilet facilities. Then getting up the next morning to chase game all day and a missed kill meant no charred meat that night. Generation after generation lived in exactly the same way, with no more hope for changes or improvements than their great-great grandparents had.
But mankind did made progress, very slowly at first: one invention leading to small improvements in the quality of living; one idea leading to more and better ideas. Slowly, very slowly at first, inventions and ideas building upon each other. Then during the Renaissance picking up speed -- faster and faster, leading to better and better quality of life. The explosion of ideas in the last century and a half has resulted in such massive lifestyle changes and improvements in comfort and technology that someone who lived only four generations ago would be amazed at the difference in lifestyle.
I won't be camping out anytime soon! Not even the thirty foot trailers with the running water, TV and air conditioners. If you want that, why not stay at home? And if you want the real cave man experience, go flick your light on and off a few times or get a cold drink out of the refrigerator and think about all the people who've lived before you who would have thought themselves in paradise!
Friday, August 04, 2006
Hacking up a phlegmball
I posted a comment today in a My Space blog. The blogger had been frustrated, not only by the poor service of a waitress, but also her derogatory comment at the slim tip she'd been left. Instead of confronting the waitress, in a calm and rational manner, she did what a lot of us do: left and felt irritated enough by the experience to blow off steam writing a blog about it.
It's easy to preach and harder to practice, and I admit I've done it much less in the past than I should have. It's hard to find the confidence to stand up and draw attention to yourself. Hard, too, when you're afraid your temper will get the better of you, and you'll descend to a level of screaming and swearing which will cheapen your stand and make you look bad. But I like to think I'm standing up for myself a bit more than I used to and I'll continue to worry less and less about what others think of me until I'm a crabby old lady who says whatever she thinks.
Unfortunately the Internet, with all the great services it provides and friendships between people who never would have met otherwise, opens the door to idiots and creeps also. Stalkers and Pedophiles and Hackers (oh my!).
The Internet allows cowardly, insecure people a degree of anonymity that gives them false courage. They don't use their internet savvy to create, only to tear down what others have created. I've heard graffiti praised as an art form. There are some people with artistic talent who have drawn beautiful pictures on ugly, tenement buildings or rotting fences with crumbling paint or concrete blocks. But that's not graffiti, guys, those are called murals. That is "art." "Rick + Lisa 4ever," "Jets Rule!!!!" and the F word -- no matter what colors you spray paint it in or how many curlicues you use or how psychedelic it looks -- is not art. It is garbage.
Hackers are graffiti garbage spewers. They enter sites, take out content, and replace it with garbage. They do it because it brings a feeling of power to an otherwise sad and unremarkable life. Sometimes they do it because they have a grudge against someone and they figure it's revenge. I suppose they consider themselves like Robin Hood or freedom fighters. They're striking a blow against their enemies, in the time honored tradition of might makes right. Are they any different, morally, than people who break into houses? Are they any different from any other form of bully?
Anyone who thinks it's a joke or no big deal would no doubt be outraged if they began finding things out of place in their house every night when they come home. Little bits of evidence that someone was there -- that someone has the power to get in and out of their house with impunity. Someone who didn't do any vandalism this time, but may later, if they so choose. Hacking doesn't have the danger of someone actually, physically threatening you, but that doesn't justify the bullying, that doesn't justify the small minds trying to make other people feel smaller than they.
These are people who are mentally ill. If they were only taking it out by hacking, maybe that would be a release valve and I could at least think that by hacking they were sparing those around them. But I have a feeling these are people who make life miserable both for those within the Internet and those around them. These are the people who probably trip nerds, feel up women and run, or use their cell phones to take pictures up women's skirts. These are women (and I'm sure that women are hacking in larger numbers as we learn more about the Internet) who make their parents, husbands, boyfriends, children miserable. These are people who spread malicious lies and gossip at work, who litter, who pee in communal pools, who pick their noses in public, who steal candy from babies. In other words (to end with a quote from Blazing Saddles)... assholes.
It's easy to preach and harder to practice, and I admit I've done it much less in the past than I should have. It's hard to find the confidence to stand up and draw attention to yourself. Hard, too, when you're afraid your temper will get the better of you, and you'll descend to a level of screaming and swearing which will cheapen your stand and make you look bad. But I like to think I'm standing up for myself a bit more than I used to and I'll continue to worry less and less about what others think of me until I'm a crabby old lady who says whatever she thinks.
Unfortunately the Internet, with all the great services it provides and friendships between people who never would have met otherwise, opens the door to idiots and creeps also. Stalkers and Pedophiles and Hackers (oh my!).
The Internet allows cowardly, insecure people a degree of anonymity that gives them false courage. They don't use their internet savvy to create, only to tear down what others have created. I've heard graffiti praised as an art form. There are some people with artistic talent who have drawn beautiful pictures on ugly, tenement buildings or rotting fences with crumbling paint or concrete blocks. But that's not graffiti, guys, those are called murals. That is "art." "Rick + Lisa 4ever," "Jets Rule!!!!" and the F word -- no matter what colors you spray paint it in or how many curlicues you use or how psychedelic it looks -- is not art. It is garbage.
Hackers are graffiti garbage spewers. They enter sites, take out content, and replace it with garbage. They do it because it brings a feeling of power to an otherwise sad and unremarkable life. Sometimes they do it because they have a grudge against someone and they figure it's revenge. I suppose they consider themselves like Robin Hood or freedom fighters. They're striking a blow against their enemies, in the time honored tradition of might makes right. Are they any different, morally, than people who break into houses? Are they any different from any other form of bully?
Anyone who thinks it's a joke or no big deal would no doubt be outraged if they began finding things out of place in their house every night when they come home. Little bits of evidence that someone was there -- that someone has the power to get in and out of their house with impunity. Someone who didn't do any vandalism this time, but may later, if they so choose. Hacking doesn't have the danger of someone actually, physically threatening you, but that doesn't justify the bullying, that doesn't justify the small minds trying to make other people feel smaller than they.
These are people who are mentally ill. If they were only taking it out by hacking, maybe that would be a release valve and I could at least think that by hacking they were sparing those around them. But I have a feeling these are people who make life miserable both for those within the Internet and those around them. These are the people who probably trip nerds, feel up women and run, or use their cell phones to take pictures up women's skirts. These are women (and I'm sure that women are hacking in larger numbers as we learn more about the Internet) who make their parents, husbands, boyfriends, children miserable. These are people who spread malicious lies and gossip at work, who litter, who pee in communal pools, who pick their noses in public, who steal candy from babies. In other words (to end with a quote from Blazing Saddles)... assholes.
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
Interview with Warren Murphy and Jim Mullaney
It's finally here! The members of DestroyerClub had sent the two Destroyer authors questions. I think they held off until they could announce the name of the new publisher. It was put up on the site at midnight. You can read the interview here
I'm also going to copy Brian Murphy's announcement about the new publisher here. Some of that info (except for the name) had been known by Dclub members prior to the interview, but will be news to anyone who hasn't been checking the site.
Brian's announcement:
Warren Murphy announced today the signing of a multi-book contract with Tor Books, part of the St. Martin's publishing group, for the publication beginning in 2007 of the long-running Destroyer series.
The books will be written and bylined by Murphy and by James Mullaney who has written some twenty books in the series.
Murphy said the new contract is a departure from the past Destroyer contracts which generally called for four new paperbacks each year. "This contract," Murphy said, "calls for paperback and hardcover books and also plans on the release in trade paperback form of some of the earlier Destroyer novels."
"As such," Murphy added, "it's something new for us and for the Destroyer series. But it's a far different publishing world out there than the one we started out with and you either grow or go away. We've decided to grow. That'll no doubt entail startup pains and getting used to a whole new set of systems and procedures but Jim Mullaney are I are looking forward to the challenge."
The Destroyer series was begun by Richard Sapir and Murphy back in 1971. Its first publisher was Pinnacle Books, followed by N.A.L. Signet and then, for the last ten years, by Harlequin Gold Eagle of Canada. During that period, Destroyer sales reached 45 million copies worldwide and at its height, the series was published in fifteen different countries. In addition, the books are now under option in Hollywood for a new feature film.
Gold Eagle sought a book contract renewal from Murphy but he declined because, he said, "I didn't like the direction the books were taking."
The final Gold Eagle Destroyer, #145, is due out in October. The first Tor book is scheduled for release in April 2007. "We're still working on scheduling and other details but the goal is to maintain our publishing frequency as much as possible."
Murphy called himself "highly delighted" over the new contract with Tor which he called "one of the serious big-time publishers. We've been doing the Destroyers for thirty-five years and who knows? Now, as part of the Tor family, we might be doing them for another thirty-five years."
For questions or to comment on the state of the series, please utilize our forums @ www.warrenmurphy.com and www.DestroyerClub.com.
I'm also going to copy Brian Murphy's announcement about the new publisher here. Some of that info (except for the name) had been known by Dclub members prior to the interview, but will be news to anyone who hasn't been checking the site.
Brian's announcement:
Warren Murphy announced today the signing of a multi-book contract with Tor Books, part of the St. Martin's publishing group, for the publication beginning in 2007 of the long-running Destroyer series.
The books will be written and bylined by Murphy and by James Mullaney who has written some twenty books in the series.
Murphy said the new contract is a departure from the past Destroyer contracts which generally called for four new paperbacks each year. "This contract," Murphy said, "calls for paperback and hardcover books and also plans on the release in trade paperback form of some of the earlier Destroyer novels."
"As such," Murphy added, "it's something new for us and for the Destroyer series. But it's a far different publishing world out there than the one we started out with and you either grow or go away. We've decided to grow. That'll no doubt entail startup pains and getting used to a whole new set of systems and procedures but Jim Mullaney are I are looking forward to the challenge."
The Destroyer series was begun by Richard Sapir and Murphy back in 1971. Its first publisher was Pinnacle Books, followed by N.A.L. Signet and then, for the last ten years, by Harlequin Gold Eagle of Canada. During that period, Destroyer sales reached 45 million copies worldwide and at its height, the series was published in fifteen different countries. In addition, the books are now under option in Hollywood for a new feature film.
Gold Eagle sought a book contract renewal from Murphy but he declined because, he said, "I didn't like the direction the books were taking."
The final Gold Eagle Destroyer, #145, is due out in October. The first Tor book is scheduled for release in April 2007. "We're still working on scheduling and other details but the goal is to maintain our publishing frequency as much as possible."
Murphy called himself "highly delighted" over the new contract with Tor which he called "one of the serious big-time publishers. We've been doing the Destroyers for thirty-five years and who knows? Now, as part of the Tor family, we might be doing them for another thirty-five years."
For questions or to comment on the state of the series, please utilize our forums @ www.warrenmurphy.com and www.DestroyerClub.com.
Monday, July 03, 2006
Happy Fourth
A happy Fourth of July to everyone in the U.S. A happy summer to those in the Northern hemisphere. And for anyone down below the equator? Well, warm weather's coming.
This should be an eventful week. I finally ordered DSL, after complaining about dial up and my ISP for over a year. Though I've been having trouble with the phone lines, hopefully DSL will be speedy enough even if the line crackles now and again. The installation package came today, but I'm going to hold off connecting until after the holiday. It should be easy and uncomplicated, but you never know. My friend got the same thing last month and their older computer didn't have the ethernet card to support it. They didn't have Internet access until her nephew could buy and install it. My computer is less than a year old, and I remember when I got it the booklet said it was DSL ready. I'm just hoping they meant the card as well as the connection port.
This isn't the week to lose the Internet for an extended period. The web master at DestroyerClub mailed our questions to Warren Murphy and Jim Mullaney on the 13th and I'm hoping this will be the week we get the answers. I'm guessing that maybe they've taken this long to return them for one (or both) of two reasons.
They may be writing the first new Destroyer book for the new publisher. Second, since there have been delays with the contract signing, maybe they are waiting until that's settled to return them. Some of the questions did have answers that depend on Warren being able to divulge the name of the publisher; he's already stated he doesn't want to do that until the signatures are on the dotted line.
It's a difficult wait. The next-to-last Gold Eagle Destroyer is coming out this month. I'm not looking forward to it, but I'll still buy and and try to get a little enjoyment. Even though it's like seeing old friends through a warped mirror.
This should be an eventful week. I finally ordered DSL, after complaining about dial up and my ISP for over a year. Though I've been having trouble with the phone lines, hopefully DSL will be speedy enough even if the line crackles now and again. The installation package came today, but I'm going to hold off connecting until after the holiday. It should be easy and uncomplicated, but you never know. My friend got the same thing last month and their older computer didn't have the ethernet card to support it. They didn't have Internet access until her nephew could buy and install it. My computer is less than a year old, and I remember when I got it the booklet said it was DSL ready. I'm just hoping they meant the card as well as the connection port.
This isn't the week to lose the Internet for an extended period. The web master at DestroyerClub mailed our questions to Warren Murphy and Jim Mullaney on the 13th and I'm hoping this will be the week we get the answers. I'm guessing that maybe they've taken this long to return them for one (or both) of two reasons.
They may be writing the first new Destroyer book for the new publisher. Second, since there have been delays with the contract signing, maybe they are waiting until that's settled to return them. Some of the questions did have answers that depend on Warren being able to divulge the name of the publisher; he's already stated he doesn't want to do that until the signatures are on the dotted line.
It's a difficult wait. The next-to-last Gold Eagle Destroyer is coming out this month. I'm not looking forward to it, but I'll still buy and and try to get a little enjoyment. Even though it's like seeing old friends through a warped mirror.
Saturday, July 01, 2006
Dreams and nonsense
It's July already. And I was just getting used to June. The lengthening days (now on the wane again, though not noticeably yet), the cold, the copious rain. Summer in New England! Now we'll probably get searing heat and sunny days. A good thing, but it's such an abrupt turnaround.
Another silly thing:
Because everyone born on my birthday and year has exactly the same personality, intellect and struggles with the same issues.
I did have a dream the other night. I know I dream more than I can recall when I wake up. This one must have happened right on waking, which is why I remember it.
My mother and I were going to see a movie. It probably had a title, but I can only remember that Angelina Jolie was in it. Must have heard the name recently. We were in this big, modern movie megaplex, full of glass and chrome and escalators (it was seven stories). There were no signs outside the theaters to tell us what was playing, and I guess there was nobody around to ask, because we kept going into them to check. Inside, they had the name of the movie on the wall, but it was down in front on the side and was small enough that you had to go almost down to the screen to see it.
I remember in one of the theaters I left my mom at the back while I walked up front to check out the name. When I returned, she had started talking with another older women who was saying she was trying to find her movie too, and wasn't it a shame how confusing this place was. Next thing, we were on the escalator leading down to the lobby. Not sure who we asked or how we found out, but the movie we wanted to see was on the floor we had been on, but we had to go back down to the lobby to get there. Seems the megaplex was bisected down the middle, with theaters on both sides, but you could only get to the other side through the lobby. I was thinking how the architect was a sadist for making the design so awkward. Then I woke up.
Meaning? I don't know. At least it's better than my grandmother's dreams. She's always cleaning a big house.
Another silly thing:
The Hierophant often represents learning with experts or knowledgeable teachers. This card also stands for institutions and their values. The Hierophant is a symbol of the need to conform to rules or fixed situations. His appearance in a reading can show that you are struggling with a force that is not innovative, free-spirited or individual. Groups can be enriching or stifling, depending on circumstances. Sometimes we need to follow a program or embrace tradition, other times, we need to trust ourselves. |
I am The HierophantBecause everyone born on my birthday and year has exactly the same personality, intellect and struggles with the same issues.
I did have a dream the other night. I know I dream more than I can recall when I wake up. This one must have happened right on waking, which is why I remember it.
My mother and I were going to see a movie. It probably had a title, but I can only remember that Angelina Jolie was in it. Must have heard the name recently. We were in this big, modern movie megaplex, full of glass and chrome and escalators (it was seven stories). There were no signs outside the theaters to tell us what was playing, and I guess there was nobody around to ask, because we kept going into them to check. Inside, they had the name of the movie on the wall, but it was down in front on the side and was small enough that you had to go almost down to the screen to see it.
I remember in one of the theaters I left my mom at the back while I walked up front to check out the name. When I returned, she had started talking with another older women who was saying she was trying to find her movie too, and wasn't it a shame how confusing this place was. Next thing, we were on the escalator leading down to the lobby. Not sure who we asked or how we found out, but the movie we wanted to see was on the floor we had been on, but we had to go back down to the lobby to get there. Seems the megaplex was bisected down the middle, with theaters on both sides, but you could only get to the other side through the lobby. I was thinking how the architect was a sadist for making the design so awkward. Then I woke up.
Meaning? I don't know. At least it's better than my grandmother's dreams. She's always cleaning a big house.
Monday, May 01, 2006
Patience is...
for the birds!
Word came from Warren Murphy last week that he is very close to signing with a publisher. In his note to the Destroyer Club, while he couldn't tell us the name of the publisher, he did tell us that he would have total control over the content. There would be no more ghosts. Jim Mullaney would be back as author under his own byline. And, best of all, Warren's going to get back into writing them!
I'm happy for us -- the fans. We're going to get characters who are back to normal. We're going to get rid of the strange plots and one unfortunately realized secondary character.
I'm happy for Jim Mullaney. He deserves to get his name on the books. He's a great writer, not just for the Destroyer -- its characters and humor -- but for his way of writing. His style is clear and flowing and always fun to read.
And I'm especially happy for Warren Murphy. Richard Sapir, his immensely talented partner (and Chiun channeler extraordinaire), was taken away from us much too young twenty years ago. I always had the feeling the fun went out of the series for Warren. He kept the books going with ghost writers, but he never wrote much Destroyer material after that. I think writing them again will be good for him. It'll get him back writing the no-hold-barred satire of pompous asses of all political stripes, goofy social engineers, and airhead celebrities.
Until now, I’ve always considered myself a patient person. I never minded waiting for Christmas. Even now, when the first Destroyer from the new publisher is anywhere from eight to twelve months away, that doesn’t bother me. I’ll be glad when I see the first one, but it’s fun anticipating.
No, what’s bothering me is waiting for the contracts to be signed. It’s very close, but until Warren signs on the dotted line, it can never be 100%. And that’s got me frayed! Once everything is set, I’ll be set too.
Word came from Warren Murphy last week that he is very close to signing with a publisher. In his note to the Destroyer Club, while he couldn't tell us the name of the publisher, he did tell us that he would have total control over the content. There would be no more ghosts. Jim Mullaney would be back as author under his own byline. And, best of all, Warren's going to get back into writing them!
I'm happy for us -- the fans. We're going to get characters who are back to normal. We're going to get rid of the strange plots and one unfortunately realized secondary character.
I'm happy for Jim Mullaney. He deserves to get his name on the books. He's a great writer, not just for the Destroyer -- its characters and humor -- but for his way of writing. His style is clear and flowing and always fun to read.
And I'm especially happy for Warren Murphy. Richard Sapir, his immensely talented partner (and Chiun channeler extraordinaire), was taken away from us much too young twenty years ago. I always had the feeling the fun went out of the series for Warren. He kept the books going with ghost writers, but he never wrote much Destroyer material after that. I think writing them again will be good for him. It'll get him back writing the no-hold-barred satire of pompous asses of all political stripes, goofy social engineers, and airhead celebrities.
Until now, I’ve always considered myself a patient person. I never minded waiting for Christmas. Even now, when the first Destroyer from the new publisher is anywhere from eight to twelve months away, that doesn’t bother me. I’ll be glad when I see the first one, but it’s fun anticipating.
No, what’s bothering me is waiting for the contracts to be signed. It’s very close, but until Warren signs on the dotted line, it can never be 100%. And that’s got me frayed! Once everything is set, I’ll be set too.
Wednesday, April 19, 2006
The DaVInci Blog
The DaVinci Code is out in paperback and the hardcover is still hanging around the bestseller lists while better and more worthy books have come and gone. The movie is coming up next month, spreading its gospel of rumors and distortions and fictional accounts of conspiracy. The Templar Legacy is on the best seller lists with its take on hidden Gnostic gospels that would demolish traditional Christian dogma. The Holy Blood, Holy Grail guys have another "nonfiction" book out beating the same dead horse that Jesus survived and married Mary Magdalene. A recent study reports Jesus may have walked on ice, not water.
And then there's Judas' gospel, "lost" for a millennium or more, that is finally seeing the light of day. It's supposed to be written in the second century, so can't be direct from the fink himself.
"God made me do it!" he whines in this gospel. "I was vital to His fulfilling the prophecy!"
Which, if true, would call into question the nature of Christ's sacrifice, making his crucifixion God playing with loaded dice instead of letting free will fulfill prophecy, demolishing (you guessed it) traditional Christian dogma.
Gnostic gospels exist. What is it in our nature that makes us eager to believe that they are concealing deep dark secrets? Why do so many want to believe they're truthful but are willing to doubt the official gospels? Doesn't that tell us more about ourselves?
It seems to make no difference that these gospels are in print, available in many book stores and over the internet. Even available in Catholic bookstores, which have no obligation to carry them.
The Council of Nicea in the fourth century put together the New Testament that we know today. They had to go through a lot of manuscripts and texts that purported to be the word of God, true accounts of Jesus' life, the Apostles' lives and works, letters and sayings, etc.
Critics and conspiracy theorists assert that they destroyed the texts that emphasized Jesus' humanity, while keeping the texts that emphasized Jesus' divinity. While that may be, if they were truly trying to determine the will of God, perhaps that was God's will. But people are much more inclined to cry coverup; some, depending on their agendas, see the jettisoned material as proof that the Church Fathers were hiding all kinds of alternate viewpoints.
Couldn't it be that a lot of the rejected material was repetitive, poorly written, obviously fraudulent, or clearly pushing someone's personal agenda? It happens in books and articles that are written about current events or figures in the news. There have been numerous books about John F. Kennedy and Winston Churchill. Does anyone accept everything each book asserts as, you'll pardon the expression, gospel? Maybe some, but many seek out various sources -- news items, eyewitness accounts, rebuttals from friends and enemies.
To get back to Mr. DaVinci. Why did he put himself in The Last Supper facing away from Christ? Did he see in the apostles cowards who turned away from Jesus in fear for their lives that night? And did he put himself in like that as a wry comment on his own weaknesses and imperfections? Or, if he was an atheist, maybe he just did it for laughs. Heck, if he was just a joker, we're lucky we didn't get Peter making rabbit ears behind Christ's back.
Did he paint them without halos to emphasize their humanity? Was this because he was giving a hidden sign that he had sympathy for the Gnostic viewpoint, who saw Jesus as human, not divine? Or was it his own personal viewpoint that Jesus, while God, still had a mortal body? Or that the apostles, about to run away in the Garden of Gethsemane, hadn't earned their halos yet?
DaVinci was a man of genius living in times dominated by Popes and kings and dukes and what have you. Was he a Gnostic? Was he an atheist? Does any of this matter today when we look at his paintings?
I think I'm going to write my own Gnostic conspiracy book. It will deal with an obscure sect of Rosicrucian’s who are the guardians of a holy relic that was suppressed by the Church in the 5th century. Yes, it's the Holy Spice Rack of Galilee -- made by our Savior himself, in his carpentry shop. It was an item of such poor quality, showing total ignorance of basic carpentry principles, that many at the Council of Nicea felt it was a fraud put forward to prove that Mary was, in fact, a single mother. Joseph was obviously not around to teach Jesus his trade, which meant he took a powder when he found out that Mary was with child, which would cast doubts about Jesus' divinity. I feel I will have a ready audience.
And then there's Judas' gospel, "lost" for a millennium or more, that is finally seeing the light of day. It's supposed to be written in the second century, so can't be direct from the fink himself.
"God made me do it!" he whines in this gospel. "I was vital to His fulfilling the prophecy!"
Which, if true, would call into question the nature of Christ's sacrifice, making his crucifixion God playing with loaded dice instead of letting free will fulfill prophecy, demolishing (you guessed it) traditional Christian dogma.
Gnostic gospels exist. What is it in our nature that makes us eager to believe that they are concealing deep dark secrets? Why do so many want to believe they're truthful but are willing to doubt the official gospels? Doesn't that tell us more about ourselves?
It seems to make no difference that these gospels are in print, available in many book stores and over the internet. Even available in Catholic bookstores, which have no obligation to carry them.
The Council of Nicea in the fourth century put together the New Testament that we know today. They had to go through a lot of manuscripts and texts that purported to be the word of God, true accounts of Jesus' life, the Apostles' lives and works, letters and sayings, etc.
Critics and conspiracy theorists assert that they destroyed the texts that emphasized Jesus' humanity, while keeping the texts that emphasized Jesus' divinity. While that may be, if they were truly trying to determine the will of God, perhaps that was God's will. But people are much more inclined to cry coverup; some, depending on their agendas, see the jettisoned material as proof that the Church Fathers were hiding all kinds of alternate viewpoints.
Couldn't it be that a lot of the rejected material was repetitive, poorly written, obviously fraudulent, or clearly pushing someone's personal agenda? It happens in books and articles that are written about current events or figures in the news. There have been numerous books about John F. Kennedy and Winston Churchill. Does anyone accept everything each book asserts as, you'll pardon the expression, gospel? Maybe some, but many seek out various sources -- news items, eyewitness accounts, rebuttals from friends and enemies.
To get back to Mr. DaVinci. Why did he put himself in The Last Supper facing away from Christ? Did he see in the apostles cowards who turned away from Jesus in fear for their lives that night? And did he put himself in like that as a wry comment on his own weaknesses and imperfections? Or, if he was an atheist, maybe he just did it for laughs. Heck, if he was just a joker, we're lucky we didn't get Peter making rabbit ears behind Christ's back.
Did he paint them without halos to emphasize their humanity? Was this because he was giving a hidden sign that he had sympathy for the Gnostic viewpoint, who saw Jesus as human, not divine? Or was it his own personal viewpoint that Jesus, while God, still had a mortal body? Or that the apostles, about to run away in the Garden of Gethsemane, hadn't earned their halos yet?
DaVinci was a man of genius living in times dominated by Popes and kings and dukes and what have you. Was he a Gnostic? Was he an atheist? Does any of this matter today when we look at his paintings?
I think I'm going to write my own Gnostic conspiracy book. It will deal with an obscure sect of Rosicrucian’s who are the guardians of a holy relic that was suppressed by the Church in the 5th century. Yes, it's the Holy Spice Rack of Galilee -- made by our Savior himself, in his carpentry shop. It was an item of such poor quality, showing total ignorance of basic carpentry principles, that many at the Council of Nicea felt it was a fraud put forward to prove that Mary was, in fact, a single mother. Joseph was obviously not around to teach Jesus his trade, which meant he took a powder when he found out that Mary was with child, which would cast doubts about Jesus' divinity. I feel I will have a ready audience.
Monday, April 03, 2006
Destroyer Movie news from Warren Murphy
Brian Murphy released this item this afternoon on Warren Murphy's Forum
Warren Murphy announced today that he had signed a Destroyer film production deal with Robert Evans independent production company in Hollywood. The deal covers film and television, as well as computer
games and merchandising, and the old man says "after quite a few years in the Destroyer doldrums, we've got a chance here of seeing something good happen."
For those who don't know, Robert Evans is a one-time actor who took over the running of Paramount Studios when the company was down the drain and on the verge of bankruptcy. In just a handful of years,
Evans produced The Odd Couple, Rosemary's Baby, Chinatown, Love Story and The Godfather, and turned Paramount into the hottest studio in town.
This is great news, though I realize it may take awhile for a movie to begin production and there are many things which can go wrong.
I'm really hoping this stirs interest for the Destroyer books with a publishing company, and that this comes sooner rather than later. The contract with Gold Eagle is up as of this year and I'd like to see the books continue on with a minimum of interruption. Even if a publisher can be found, there would be more of a gap than the usual three months Destroyer readers have become used to.
A new publisher might choose to issue only two books a year instead of four. Or they might issue two Destroyers and two spinoffs (good too!). Or four Destroyers and two spinoffs (I'm getting greedy here).
Warren Murphy announced today that he had signed a Destroyer film production deal with Robert Evans independent production company in Hollywood. The deal covers film and television, as well as computer
games and merchandising, and the old man says "after quite a few years in the Destroyer doldrums, we've got a chance here of seeing something good happen."
For those who don't know, Robert Evans is a one-time actor who took over the running of Paramount Studios when the company was down the drain and on the verge of bankruptcy. In just a handful of years,
Evans produced The Odd Couple, Rosemary's Baby, Chinatown, Love Story and The Godfather, and turned Paramount into the hottest studio in town.
This is great news, though I realize it may take awhile for a movie to begin production and there are many things which can go wrong.
I'm really hoping this stirs interest for the Destroyer books with a publishing company, and that this comes sooner rather than later. The contract with Gold Eagle is up as of this year and I'd like to see the books continue on with a minimum of interruption. Even if a publisher can be found, there would be more of a gap than the usual three months Destroyer readers have become used to.
A new publisher might choose to issue only two books a year instead of four. Or they might issue two Destroyers and two spinoffs (good too!). Or four Destroyers and two spinoffs (I'm getting greedy here).
Sunday, April 02, 2006
Windows XP
Warren Murphy has started a blog in the forums of his website. A few weeks ago, amid many other things, he mentioned his hatred of and frustration with Windows XP. Most of his frustration was not being able to find things, which are spread out in odd ways. And always being asked what to open a program with when he clicks on it.
I don't have too many problems opening things, since I mostly work with Open Office documents. When you save a new OO document, if you type .odt after the title you choose, it opens up in OO automatically when you need to view it again. I do have a problem choosing media stuff, but I generally know what to go with. The new Harry Potter movie had me downloading something called InterActual, which isn't a very good DVD player. I gave up trying to view anything on it and opened it in Windows Media center, which worked fine.
Last night, for some reason, I decided to go beyond what usually comes up when I click on Programs (Windows XP usually only shows you the programs you use most frequently). I got into "Windows Digital Media Enhancements," which looked interesting. Though, like Warren has pointed out, why it's so far away from "Media Center" which is under Accessories? It's all media, isn't it?
Anyway, under WDME (I'm not going to keep typing that whole thing out!), they've put a program that allows you to convert audio files to the Windows format (.wma), and a program that prints a label for your CD and CD case.
Thirdly, it has a "Party Mode" which is basically a full screen skin for your Windows Media Player. That was a little frightening. I turned it on and couldn't find a way to get out of it, so I had to click on control/alt/delete. When I went back to the Settings screen, there's supposed to be a little X somewhere that removes you from the party, but I don't recall seeing it the first time and I'm not going back to check. The big window with the randomization setting in my player is enough for me.
Now, for the last and creepiest thing. WDME has something called Windows Dancer. When you click on it a little dancing woman appears in the bottom left hand corner of your screen. The general operating question here is: why? Who thought this up? Is this so lonely people won't have to dance by themselves? Or in case you feel like having a party and everyone's busy?
When I see these things, I feel just like one of the Beverly Hillbillies, trying to figure out the billyard room and the cement pond.
"Granny! Uncle Jed! There's a little woman dancin' on the screen!"
"Weee-el doggie!"
"Jed! Jed!! Get that 'lil goomer off the screen!"
I felt bad for her dancing away to nothing, so I opened my WMP and opened a song. I'm Alright isn't exactly the hip hop she seems to be bopping to, but it'll have to do. It's more suitable than The Donkey Serenade or O Holy Night.
It's good to know that Microsoft is gearing it's Windows for parties. When you're dancing, programs don't need to make sense. Items don't have to be near similar items.
I don't have too many problems opening things, since I mostly work with Open Office documents. When you save a new OO document, if you type .odt after the title you choose, it opens up in OO automatically when you need to view it again. I do have a problem choosing media stuff, but I generally know what to go with. The new Harry Potter movie had me downloading something called InterActual, which isn't a very good DVD player. I gave up trying to view anything on it and opened it in Windows Media center, which worked fine.
Last night, for some reason, I decided to go beyond what usually comes up when I click on Programs (Windows XP usually only shows you the programs you use most frequently). I got into "Windows Digital Media Enhancements," which looked interesting. Though, like Warren has pointed out, why it's so far away from "Media Center" which is under Accessories? It's all media, isn't it?
Anyway, under WDME (I'm not going to keep typing that whole thing out!), they've put a program that allows you to convert audio files to the Windows format (.wma), and a program that prints a label for your CD and CD case.
Thirdly, it has a "Party Mode" which is basically a full screen skin for your Windows Media Player. That was a little frightening. I turned it on and couldn't find a way to get out of it, so I had to click on control/alt/delete. When I went back to the Settings screen, there's supposed to be a little X somewhere that removes you from the party, but I don't recall seeing it the first time and I'm not going back to check. The big window with the randomization setting in my player is enough for me.
Now, for the last and creepiest thing. WDME has something called Windows Dancer. When you click on it a little dancing woman appears in the bottom left hand corner of your screen. The general operating question here is: why? Who thought this up? Is this so lonely people won't have to dance by themselves? Or in case you feel like having a party and everyone's busy?
When I see these things, I feel just like one of the Beverly Hillbillies, trying to figure out the billyard room and the cement pond.
"Granny! Uncle Jed! There's a little woman dancin' on the screen!"
"Weee-el doggie!"
"Jed! Jed!! Get that 'lil goomer off the screen!"
I felt bad for her dancing away to nothing, so I opened my WMP and opened a song. I'm Alright isn't exactly the hip hop she seems to be bopping to, but it'll have to do. It's more suitable than The Donkey Serenade or O Holy Night.
It's good to know that Microsoft is gearing it's Windows for parties. When you're dancing, programs don't need to make sense. Items don't have to be near similar items.
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
Pathetic Losers
A few friends and I have been having a little problem recently with hackers. Saturday when I went to my website all the news items on my home page, which I have been using as a blog, were gone. No one took credit, though.
Shortly before that, my friend Jerry had a small hacking problem also, though they left something in place of what they'd hacked, and most of his home page and everything else was left intact.
Now tonight, when I go to my site, everything looks normal, except when I go to my forum, the only other place on the site where I have any content, and not only is it missing, but there's something left in place. Bragging by the pathetic losers who have too much time on their hands and whose mommies should be monitoring their Internet access more closely. Unfortunately, Jerry's site has been hit by the same people and I can't access it at all. And Jim's is the same. So I don't know how much they're going to end up losing.
The really pathetic part of this is, we're all such small, untrafficked web sites. Jerry says a mutual friend wrote to him saying it looks like someone's targeting us personally. And that Dclub, a web site we all belong to and administer, might be a future target.
Jerry says he's going to take precautions before that happens. Dclub just finished being restored and doesn't need to take another hit, though thanks to the recent problem, everything's backed up and certain sections are also being saved off site for greater protection.
I'm not sad for my site. The forum contained some fan fiction I've written, and I've got them all saved to disc anyway. And the blogs they hit, thanks to my tendency to cross-post, and write them up in Open Office before posting, can be restored fairly easily too. The worst that could be lost on Jim's site is his thoughts on the Destroyer books he wrote, but Jerry says that's saved off site too. Jerry has more on his site, though, and hopefully that won't be lost.
If it should turn out to be a disgruntled Dclub member, he/she probably isn't a regular. I'm certainly not going to let this make me paranoid. Most of the regulars are frequent posters, or long time members and I don't see any one of them having this level of childishness and viciousness.
Shortly before that, my friend Jerry had a small hacking problem also, though they left something in place of what they'd hacked, and most of his home page and everything else was left intact.
Now tonight, when I go to my site, everything looks normal, except when I go to my forum, the only other place on the site where I have any content, and not only is it missing, but there's something left in place. Bragging by the pathetic losers who have too much time on their hands and whose mommies should be monitoring their Internet access more closely. Unfortunately, Jerry's site has been hit by the same people and I can't access it at all. And Jim's is the same. So I don't know how much they're going to end up losing.
The really pathetic part of this is, we're all such small, untrafficked web sites. Jerry says a mutual friend wrote to him saying it looks like someone's targeting us personally. And that Dclub, a web site we all belong to and administer, might be a future target.
Jerry says he's going to take precautions before that happens. Dclub just finished being restored and doesn't need to take another hit, though thanks to the recent problem, everything's backed up and certain sections are also being saved off site for greater protection.
I'm not sad for my site. The forum contained some fan fiction I've written, and I've got them all saved to disc anyway. And the blogs they hit, thanks to my tendency to cross-post, and write them up in Open Office before posting, can be restored fairly easily too. The worst that could be lost on Jim's site is his thoughts on the Destroyer books he wrote, but Jerry says that's saved off site too. Jerry has more on his site, though, and hopefully that won't be lost.
If it should turn out to be a disgruntled Dclub member, he/she probably isn't a regular. I'm certainly not going to let this make me paranoid. Most of the regulars are frequent posters, or long time members and I don't see any one of them having this level of childishness and viciousness.
Monday, March 13, 2006
This and That
Slow week. Was sick during much of it. Not real sick; just enough to be uncomfortable and sleepy because I kept waking up coughing and choking.
Good week in that it started with a pleasant surprise: Brian Murphy finally got Warren Murphy's forum back up. You could read the old posts, but couldn't post anything new since the day after Christmas. He changed to PHP BB, which is better than what they had, and created separate forums for each of Warren's books and series.
Then he created a forum for Warren to write blogs in, along with a forum for our comments. No blogs as yet, but I'm hopeful. Warren did write in saying he might have some news on the Destroyer front. I hope it's got a new publisher.
The DestroyerClub's forum came back on line too. It's only been down for three weeks, but that's still too long. There was a time when it looked like all the posts would be lost, which would be annoying. There was also a possibility that we'd lose the member's list, which would have been a real inconvenience. Anyone who wanted to post or get into some sections would have had to register again.
But none of that happened. The admins decided to start anew by locking the old forum and opening up a new one, with the same topics pretty much as the old one. It's been going good so far. A few of the regulars aren't back, but I know one is off line and the other's pretty busy in his off line life, so they should be back too someday.
***********
Read a pretty good book, unusual type for me, but I try to read something in a genre I wouldn't usually pick up. That's the good thing about a large and well stocked library. You can take chances when you're just borrowing.
Prayers for the Assassin is set in the near future. In 2015 nuclear bombs that destroyed NYC, Washington, DC, and Mecca are blamed on Israel. Civil war breaks out in the United States.
Twenty five years later, the nation is divided into the Islamic controlled North and the Bible Belt South. Most of the population of the Islamic Republic are moderate or modern Islamics, but the hard line fundamentalists have power beyond their numbers, and the Christian minority are discriminated against.
Then a historian uncovers evidence that Israel might not have been responsible, which would destabilize the nation and the world. When she goes missing, her uncle calls his former ward, Rakkim -- who is also her lover -- to find her. Other people are looking for her too, including a psychotic assassin who was in the same elite unit as Rakkim. Will Rakkim find her first? Together, will they survive reveal the secret?
Good paced thriller, not too violent (I'm squeamish). The hero and heroine here are Muslims, as are most of the major characters, including the villains. It's not a Muslim bashing book; though a fundamentalists is a bad guy, another one is not, and the psycho assassin only recognizes one god -- himself.
**************
I also found out that starting next Friday the Scifi channel is finally bringing Dr. Who to US audiences. I used to watch the parts of the old series when they played on PBS many years ago. They only played the Jon Pertwee and Tom Baker episodes. Fun cheesy special effects and simple plots (it was a children's series after all). Fun to watch.
There was a movie several years ago that updated the series and went nowhere. It was ok, as far as I can remember.
Scifi is showing the first year of the new series. If it's any good, I hope they go on to show the next year's episodes. There's a new Doctor the second year. I've heard good things about it; will enjoy checking it out.
Good week in that it started with a pleasant surprise: Brian Murphy finally got Warren Murphy's forum back up. You could read the old posts, but couldn't post anything new since the day after Christmas. He changed to PHP BB, which is better than what they had, and created separate forums for each of Warren's books and series.
Then he created a forum for Warren to write blogs in, along with a forum for our comments. No blogs as yet, but I'm hopeful. Warren did write in saying he might have some news on the Destroyer front. I hope it's got a new publisher.
The DestroyerClub's forum came back on line too. It's only been down for three weeks, but that's still too long. There was a time when it looked like all the posts would be lost, which would be annoying. There was also a possibility that we'd lose the member's list, which would have been a real inconvenience. Anyone who wanted to post or get into some sections would have had to register again.
But none of that happened. The admins decided to start anew by locking the old forum and opening up a new one, with the same topics pretty much as the old one. It's been going good so far. A few of the regulars aren't back, but I know one is off line and the other's pretty busy in his off line life, so they should be back too someday.
Read a pretty good book, unusual type for me, but I try to read something in a genre I wouldn't usually pick up. That's the good thing about a large and well stocked library. You can take chances when you're just borrowing.
Prayers for the Assassin is set in the near future. In 2015 nuclear bombs that destroyed NYC, Washington, DC, and Mecca are blamed on Israel. Civil war breaks out in the United States.
Twenty five years later, the nation is divided into the Islamic controlled North and the Bible Belt South. Most of the population of the Islamic Republic are moderate or modern Islamics, but the hard line fundamentalists have power beyond their numbers, and the Christian minority are discriminated against.
Then a historian uncovers evidence that Israel might not have been responsible, which would destabilize the nation and the world. When she goes missing, her uncle calls his former ward, Rakkim -- who is also her lover -- to find her. Other people are looking for her too, including a psychotic assassin who was in the same elite unit as Rakkim. Will Rakkim find her first? Together, will they survive reveal the secret?
Good paced thriller, not too violent (I'm squeamish). The hero and heroine here are Muslims, as are most of the major characters, including the villains. It's not a Muslim bashing book; though a fundamentalists is a bad guy, another one is not, and the psycho assassin only recognizes one god -- himself.
I also found out that starting next Friday the Scifi channel is finally bringing Dr. Who to US audiences. I used to watch the parts of the old series when they played on PBS many years ago. They only played the Jon Pertwee and Tom Baker episodes. Fun cheesy special effects and simple plots (it was a children's series after all). Fun to watch.
There was a movie several years ago that updated the series and went nowhere. It was ok, as far as I can remember.
Scifi is showing the first year of the new series. If it's any good, I hope they go on to show the next year's episodes. There's a new Doctor the second year. I've heard good things about it; will enjoy checking it out.
Friday, February 24, 2006
Workshop with Tom Coughlin
Tom Coughlin, a native of my city who writes books set locally, was at my city library tonight giving a talk on successful self publishing.
My book is only on its first edit, and I don't know what I'll do with it -- try to get an agent to look at it, try to self publish, shelve it and write a second, better book. But I have a theory that it's better to know as much as possible about as many things as possible. Since I've started writing seriously, I've been reading all the books on writing and publishing I can get hold of, visiting author's web sites, writing web sites, picking up stray bits of info wherever I can find them.
If what I've learned never benefits me, it might help someone else, so I'll pass along a little of tonight's talk here.
First, the three things that prompt a reader to buy: a cover that is bright and catches the eye, a good title, and a reasonable cover price.
Three things that a store owner looks for: cover and price also. But also if it is set locally, the bookseller figures it'll pique the interest of natives and tourists (if it's a place that has a bit of a tourist trade).
If you're shopping your book around locally, don't just hit bookstores. Try gift shops, restaurants. If your book is the only one in the shop, it stands out. Big chains don't buy self published books as a rule, but a few of them have managers who are willing to give your book a chance. Be prepared to do a bit of traveling and promotion to get your books in as many outlets as you can within the area where your book is set.
Autograph as many of your books as you can before you bring them around to stores. Invest in a roll of stickers that say they're autographed and get those on the front of the book. Make up promotional posters featuring the book's cover and ask around in shops if you can put them up in the window.
If 6x9 paperbacks sell for $14.95 generally, try to sell yours for a little less. Don't sell for more; you're trying to get people to buy an unknown author.
Of course, you still won't make a profit unless you work hard and write the best book you can. And let people you trust and who are in the know about these things read the book and tell you honestly whether your book is good enough to make an investment of time and money worth while.
And it does take a bit of money. Print on Demand isn't as good if you're going to put them in local bookstores and shops locally. You don't get a discount for bulk. However, if you're going through a printer, you have to buy a minimum -- usually about 3300 books. Even with a discount, it adds up.
For example, my Nano book would cost me $8 a copy if I'd wanted more than the free one. Multiply that by the number you'd have to purchase if you wanted to get maybe five or six copies in several dozen local outlets. Say 48. That would be $384. But with a printer who offers a discount for bulk, that same book might cost me $2.95 apiece for 3300 copies. That's $9735.
Say you sell your book for $13.95. You'd have to sell at least 698 books to break even. You would only have to sell 27 of your POD printed book. But firstly, that's a much higher percentage of sales -- over half your POD stock as opposed to less than 1/3 of your bulk stock. Second, you'd be selling in much fewer places, making it harder to sell even that many.
And that won't happen unless you're out hustling. People aren't going to be beating down your door unless by some miracle Oprah gets hold of a copy. Even if she hates it, the curiosity factor alone would make it a success! Well, we can dream.
I haven't even touched on cover art and the cost to hire a good artist or photographer. Unless you're an artist, or know someone willing to work for a credit in the book, that's probably a few thousand dollars.
Print on Demand is probably best if you sell just through the POD's online site. At least initially, it might let you know if the book gets a good reception, if you hear back from a buyer who doesn't know you personally, just bought the book because it sounded good.
To wrap up, a very good talk, many points raised to think about. I thought Mr. Coughlin should have brought some of his books for us to purchase, but he said he just wanted to give the talk with no strings attached. I think I'll buy at least one of his books though. He was a teenager in the sixties while I was under ten. He probably has a much clearer memory of the stores and restaurants from then than I do.
Let's see... Bon Marche, Sparks. The Dutch Tearoom. I remember the murals there... MacQuades. I think I've got that spelling right.
My book is only on its first edit, and I don't know what I'll do with it -- try to get an agent to look at it, try to self publish, shelve it and write a second, better book. But I have a theory that it's better to know as much as possible about as many things as possible. Since I've started writing seriously, I've been reading all the books on writing and publishing I can get hold of, visiting author's web sites, writing web sites, picking up stray bits of info wherever I can find them.
If what I've learned never benefits me, it might help someone else, so I'll pass along a little of tonight's talk here.
First, the three things that prompt a reader to buy: a cover that is bright and catches the eye, a good title, and a reasonable cover price.
Three things that a store owner looks for: cover and price also. But also if it is set locally, the bookseller figures it'll pique the interest of natives and tourists (if it's a place that has a bit of a tourist trade).
If you're shopping your book around locally, don't just hit bookstores. Try gift shops, restaurants. If your book is the only one in the shop, it stands out. Big chains don't buy self published books as a rule, but a few of them have managers who are willing to give your book a chance. Be prepared to do a bit of traveling and promotion to get your books in as many outlets as you can within the area where your book is set.
Autograph as many of your books as you can before you bring them around to stores. Invest in a roll of stickers that say they're autographed and get those on the front of the book. Make up promotional posters featuring the book's cover and ask around in shops if you can put them up in the window.
If 6x9 paperbacks sell for $14.95 generally, try to sell yours for a little less. Don't sell for more; you're trying to get people to buy an unknown author.
Of course, you still won't make a profit unless you work hard and write the best book you can. And let people you trust and who are in the know about these things read the book and tell you honestly whether your book is good enough to make an investment of time and money worth while.
And it does take a bit of money. Print on Demand isn't as good if you're going to put them in local bookstores and shops locally. You don't get a discount for bulk. However, if you're going through a printer, you have to buy a minimum -- usually about 3300 books. Even with a discount, it adds up.
For example, my Nano book would cost me $8 a copy if I'd wanted more than the free one. Multiply that by the number you'd have to purchase if you wanted to get maybe five or six copies in several dozen local outlets. Say 48. That would be $384. But with a printer who offers a discount for bulk, that same book might cost me $2.95 apiece for 3300 copies. That's $9735.
Say you sell your book for $13.95. You'd have to sell at least 698 books to break even. You would only have to sell 27 of your POD printed book. But firstly, that's a much higher percentage of sales -- over half your POD stock as opposed to less than 1/3 of your bulk stock. Second, you'd be selling in much fewer places, making it harder to sell even that many.
And that won't happen unless you're out hustling. People aren't going to be beating down your door unless by some miracle Oprah gets hold of a copy. Even if she hates it, the curiosity factor alone would make it a success! Well, we can dream.
I haven't even touched on cover art and the cost to hire a good artist or photographer. Unless you're an artist, or know someone willing to work for a credit in the book, that's probably a few thousand dollars.
Print on Demand is probably best if you sell just through the POD's online site. At least initially, it might let you know if the book gets a good reception, if you hear back from a buyer who doesn't know you personally, just bought the book because it sounded good.
To wrap up, a very good talk, many points raised to think about. I thought Mr. Coughlin should have brought some of his books for us to purchase, but he said he just wanted to give the talk with no strings attached. I think I'll buy at least one of his books though. He was a teenager in the sixties while I was under ten. He probably has a much clearer memory of the stores and restaurants from then than I do.
Let's see... Bon Marche, Sparks. The Dutch Tearoom. I remember the murals there... MacQuades. I think I've got that spelling right.
Sunday, January 29, 2006
Currant Events (or problems with spell check)
First, I must apologize to the currant growers, who may have come across this title when searching the web, and came here eager for news of the current state of the currant industry.
One of the problems if you're a bad speller, is relying on programs within Works, Word, Open Office, Gmail, Email, etc. that are supposed to check your spelling, making you look erudite, thus giving your opinions and rants greater weight and respect. Usually, they're pretty good, not up on the latest netspeak and shortcuts, but that's a small problem.
The bigger problem is homophones (rain/reign/rein, break/brake). Most of them I don't have trouble with. Occasionally, I'll have to stop and think: they're = they are, their = belonging to them, there = a location. I generally find if I'm typing fast that last one will get by me sometimes. And spellcheck can't tell you you're using it incorrectly.
My biggest homophone problem, as you might have guessed, is the word which means contemporary. I was using it frequently in something I was writing, and I'd have to check the dictionary every time it came up.
At least in this case, a mnemonic device has proved very effective. If I need to write about current events, or an electric current, or river current, a picture of an animated, wrinkled fruit pops into my head. It is jumping up and down, waving its little stick arms, its eyes angry and mouth going a mile a minute. The currant is ranting (get it -- nudge, nudge)! It is therefore not thewrite right (damn homophones!) spelling for any of the meanings I want to convey.
I'll never get that wrong again. Now, if only some spellchecks could be made to admit when they don't know what a word is. Recently, my Open Office spellcheck didn't highlight the word "dieing," which I had twice in a manuscript. Since it couldn't figure out what I was trying to say, it just ignored the whole business.
One of the problems if you're a bad speller, is relying on programs within Works, Word, Open Office, Gmail, Email, etc. that are supposed to check your spelling, making you look erudite, thus giving your opinions and rants greater weight and respect. Usually, they're pretty good, not up on the latest netspeak and shortcuts, but that's a small problem.
The bigger problem is homophones (rain/reign/rein, break/brake). Most of them I don't have trouble with. Occasionally, I'll have to stop and think: they're = they are, their = belonging to them, there = a location. I generally find if I'm typing fast that last one will get by me sometimes. And spellcheck can't tell you you're using it incorrectly.
My biggest homophone problem, as you might have guessed, is the word which means contemporary. I was using it frequently in something I was writing, and I'd have to check the dictionary every time it came up.
At least in this case, a mnemonic device has proved very effective. If I need to write about current events, or an electric current, or river current, a picture of an animated, wrinkled fruit pops into my head. It is jumping up and down, waving its little stick arms, its eyes angry and mouth going a mile a minute. The currant is ranting (get it -- nudge, nudge)! It is therefore not the
I'll never get that wrong again. Now, if only some spellchecks could be made to admit when they don't know what a word is. Recently, my Open Office spellcheck didn't highlight the word "dieing," which I had twice in a manuscript. Since it couldn't figure out what I was trying to say, it just ignored the whole business.
Wednesday, January 25, 2006
Deliveries
Today I got the two things I had ordered. First, UPS delivered the second Destroyer adaptation from Cutting Audio. They really ship promptly; I only placed the order the 19th. I'm looking forward to listening to this one -- Infernal Revenue -- more than the last one. It's one of my favorite Destroyers. I'm glad that Cutting Audio got the contract to do the adaptations, but I wish they weren't doing them in the order the books were published. I don't remember if the other company did that too. I didn't buy them all, just the ones I liked best. Cutting Audio may only have the contract for this year; I don't know if Gold Eagle will bother once they no longer have the contract to publish the books. However, they do retain the rights to all the Destroyers they've published, for how many years I don't know. So they'd still be making money on the books if they let Cutting Audio continue. And this way, maybe eventually we'd get to an audio adaptation of The End of the Beginning!
Second, the mailman delivered my book from Lulu.
I knew I'd be thrilled to see my book as a book, not just a computer file, but I had no idea how it would affect me. I actually teared up a little as I was looking through it. And not because of grammar and punctuation errors (though they are certainly there)!
It really is gratifying to see something you've created in your head and on the computer in solid form. It's a book, darn it, a real honest-to-God book. Not with the polish or sophistication of a commercially published book, but still... At least maybe, if I'm reading it through all the way for the first time really since finishing it, if it still holds my interest, maybe that means it's not hopeless.
Second, the mailman delivered my book from Lulu.
I knew I'd be thrilled to see my book as a book, not just a computer file, but I had no idea how it would affect me. I actually teared up a little as I was looking through it. And not because of grammar and punctuation errors (though they are certainly there)!
It really is gratifying to see something you've created in your head and on the computer in solid form. It's a book, darn it, a real honest-to-God book. Not with the polish or sophistication of a commercially published book, but still... At least maybe, if I'm reading it through all the way for the first time really since finishing it, if it still holds my interest, maybe that means it's not hopeless.
Thursday, January 12, 2006
Horror at the Movies
I'm not a horror movie aficionado. My taste in scary movies runs to the old Universal monsters -- Frankenstein, Dracula, the Wolf Man -- or the poorly done ones of the fifties and sixties. You know: the Blob, the Creeping Terror. Monsters that had to be helped by their victims, who stick their hands in unknown goo or run around in circles or really, r e a l l y slowly until the guys under the shag rug catch up with and devour them.
I've completely ignored horror's evolution into the bloody and gory, the psychotic madmen with chainsaws and the supernatural villains who kill without discrimination or motivation. You can get enough of that reading the news. Callous sadistic people are a minority, but they make themselves known. In short, I don't like these movies, so I don't see them.
My friend's husband, son and sister in law go to every horror movie. It's a thrill -- like riding a roller coaster or bungee jumping. And a test: they can face the grossest of the gross-out stuff and take it. That's fine with me. I don't like the bloody, explicit horror movies that started with Day of the Dead, but to each his own. I don't think it's the end of civilization, or that people will see these things and become desensitized or psychotic killers. There are some traits, like callousness, that are inborn, and emerge to a greater or lesser degree depending on a person's upbringing.
However, the latest excuse for a horror movie disappointed them. I'm not naming it; it doesn't deserve any publicity. It wasn't a question of gore, even though this was excessive, according to them. It's the spirit of the movie.
Even in the worst of these things, there are a few conventions. There's usually a hero who outfoxes the killers, a few people who have been made sympathetic and the audience roots for them to survive. Generally at least some of them do. The evil force -- whatever it is -- is defeated. At least until the sequel.
This movie, it seems, is extraordinarily mean spirited, even for the genre. According to my friend her son described it thus: The first half hour is soft porn -- beautiful young people continuously having sex -- boobs and penises out bouncing around. Then the remainder of the movie is unrelieved bloody violence. Brutal torture and bloody killings. Everybody dies. One girl who survives being blow torched in the face and having her eye pulled out throws herself under a train, gore and body parts flying about. No reason is ever given for what's happened; there is no plot.
I wonder about the motivations of the writer, director, and anyone instrumental in foisting this off on an unsuspecting public. I've read conservatives who say that Hollywood's liberal screenwriters and directors are more interested in pushing their own leftist agendas than in making good films. Is this some sort of propaganda effort by necrophiliacs? Do the people behind this film get off on gore? Is that why they have the soft core at the beginning -- to get everyone excited, then abruptly replace the images of sex with those of violence? And they hope that people are going to stay stimulated and begin to associate violence with feelings of sexual pleasure?
Not that I believe it's going to work. As I said earlier, that level of callousness and psychosis is inborn. All they're going to get from this effort, if anything, is people demanding their money back. My friend's son was disturbed and disappointed. This movie will, I predict, sink into obscurity; even the DVD version will end up in the bargain bins and go largely ignored. Unless it's publicized by people objecting to it. It is objectionable. But, much like a two year old gleeful shouting naughty words, if there's too much of a fuss made over it, thrilled by the reaction he will continue with it longer.
I've completely ignored horror's evolution into the bloody and gory, the psychotic madmen with chainsaws and the supernatural villains who kill without discrimination or motivation. You can get enough of that reading the news. Callous sadistic people are a minority, but they make themselves known. In short, I don't like these movies, so I don't see them.
My friend's husband, son and sister in law go to every horror movie. It's a thrill -- like riding a roller coaster or bungee jumping. And a test: they can face the grossest of the gross-out stuff and take it. That's fine with me. I don't like the bloody, explicit horror movies that started with Day of the Dead, but to each his own. I don't think it's the end of civilization, or that people will see these things and become desensitized or psychotic killers. There are some traits, like callousness, that are inborn, and emerge to a greater or lesser degree depending on a person's upbringing.
However, the latest excuse for a horror movie disappointed them. I'm not naming it; it doesn't deserve any publicity. It wasn't a question of gore, even though this was excessive, according to them. It's the spirit of the movie.
Even in the worst of these things, there are a few conventions. There's usually a hero who outfoxes the killers, a few people who have been made sympathetic and the audience roots for them to survive. Generally at least some of them do. The evil force -- whatever it is -- is defeated. At least until the sequel.
This movie, it seems, is extraordinarily mean spirited, even for the genre. According to my friend her son described it thus: The first half hour is soft porn -- beautiful young people continuously having sex -- boobs and penises out bouncing around. Then the remainder of the movie is unrelieved bloody violence. Brutal torture and bloody killings. Everybody dies. One girl who survives being blow torched in the face and having her eye pulled out throws herself under a train, gore and body parts flying about. No reason is ever given for what's happened; there is no plot.
I wonder about the motivations of the writer, director, and anyone instrumental in foisting this off on an unsuspecting public. I've read conservatives who say that Hollywood's liberal screenwriters and directors are more interested in pushing their own leftist agendas than in making good films. Is this some sort of propaganda effort by necrophiliacs? Do the people behind this film get off on gore? Is that why they have the soft core at the beginning -- to get everyone excited, then abruptly replace the images of sex with those of violence? And they hope that people are going to stay stimulated and begin to associate violence with feelings of sexual pleasure?
Not that I believe it's going to work. As I said earlier, that level of callousness and psychosis is inborn. All they're going to get from this effort, if anything, is people demanding their money back. My friend's son was disturbed and disappointed. This movie will, I predict, sink into obscurity; even the DVD version will end up in the bargain bins and go largely ignored. Unless it's publicized by people objecting to it. It is objectionable. But, much like a two year old gleeful shouting naughty words, if there's too much of a fuss made over it, thrilled by the reaction he will continue with it longer.
Wednesday, January 11, 2006
Recent Rowling Article
Very good J K Rowling article in the Tatler. The only version I could find was from The Leaky Cauldron's files. It went into how her mother's death while Rowling was still writing the first book has been felt in the series as a whole. Death is never far away in the Harry Potter books; Rowling doesn't pull any punches. Good characters die, bad characters die. Facing death becomes inevitable when the only alternative is to sit by and let evil spread unopposed. Yet even with that, Rowling's deaths aren't noble sacrifices as a whole. Characters are killed suddenly and senselessly. Diggery doesn't get a chance to fight back. He isn't killed throwing himself in front of Harry and taking a Killing Curse meant for him. Black's is quick -- the result of a lapse of concentration during a fight. Minor characters are killed off-page, brutally and arbitrarily. They're targeted because they oppose Voldemort, but it seems to be more a matter of luck than of skill who escapes and who dies.
The one jarring sentence in the article is, unfortunately the first one. That sentence, "A tear slowly trickles down JK Rowling's cheek," sounds uncomfortably Rita Skeeterish to me. It reminds me forcibly of the one of the sentences Harry spies being written down during his first interview with her. "Tears fill those startlingly green eyes as our conversation turns to the parents he can barely remember." (GOF, U.S. paperback ed. p.306) It doesn't spoil the article, but it kind of tripped me up until I got into the rhythm of the rest of the piece.
Rowling hadn't wanted to let her mother she was writing a book, probably because she hadn't much hope of getting it published. I think that was the biggest regret -- not that her mother missed all the fame and fortune and adulation. That's a big regret of mine, too. My mother always thought I could write for publication, but while she was alive I hadn't tried. I haven't published a book or an article, but I was published in the New Blood anthology, and that would have thrilled her. I think she would have liked that I was expressing myself here and in blogs too.
But you can't change the past; you just have to go forward and try not to regret what you can't change. And hope there's a way that somehow, somewhere, our mothers are aware of what 's going on and are happy for us.
The one jarring sentence in the article is, unfortunately the first one. That sentence, "A tear slowly trickles down JK Rowling's cheek," sounds uncomfortably Rita Skeeterish to me. It reminds me forcibly of the one of the sentences Harry spies being written down during his first interview with her. "Tears fill those startlingly green eyes as our conversation turns to the parents he can barely remember." (GOF, U.S. paperback ed. p.306) It doesn't spoil the article, but it kind of tripped me up until I got into the rhythm of the rest of the piece.
Rowling hadn't wanted to let her mother she was writing a book, probably because she hadn't much hope of getting it published. I think that was the biggest regret -- not that her mother missed all the fame and fortune and adulation. That's a big regret of mine, too. My mother always thought I could write for publication, but while she was alive I hadn't tried. I haven't published a book or an article, but I was published in the New Blood anthology, and that would have thrilled her. I think she would have liked that I was expressing myself here and in blogs too.
But you can't change the past; you just have to go forward and try not to regret what you can't change. And hope there's a way that somehow, somewhere, our mothers are aware of what 's going on and are happy for us.
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